What Caught My Eye Today - Predictions for 2008

What better way to say goodbye to the year that was, than to look forward to the year ahead. With that in mind, I'm breaking out my inner Nostradamus to share some of my predictions for 2008...

U.S. Headlines

1. President Bush will fail in his attempt to rewrite the Constitution to abolish Congress on the grounds that they don't agree with his policies, so they should just go away.


2. Congress will fail in its attempt to do anything.


3. On November 5, one day after the 2008 election, the first candidate for the 2012 presidential race will announce his or her candidacy. God help us all.


4. Gasoline prices will hit $4 per gallon on their way to 'an arm and a leg' per gallon. Meanwhile, banks will introduce new equity lines of credit for SUV owners to finance the filling up of their gas tanks.


5. The country will experience a decline in economic growth for two or more successive quarters, but no one will call it an actual recession until November 5.

World Headlines

1. Iraq will continue its struggle to get its fledgling government up and running while attempting to reduce sectarian violence. I'm going way out on a limb with this one, aren't I?


2. Iran will continue to hate the United States. Actually you can pretty much insert any Middle Eastern country in this spot and probably still be correct.


3. Africa will continue to have several countries struggle with civil war, starvation, and genocide. And unfortunately, the world will likely do nothing but watch, just like it did in 2007.


4. Vladimir Putin will be elevated to the title of Exalted Supreme King of Mother Russia. Of course, they'll only call him that behind closed doors. For the rest of the world he'll probably be referred to as Prime Minister.


5. Global warming will probably continue, as will the denials that it is happening.

Popular Culture Headlines

1. Britney Spears will continue her quest to have the moniker 'too stupid to live' be permanently associated with her.


2. Jamie Lynn Spears will do everything in her power to steal that title from her older sister.


3. Movie theaters will see ticket sales plummet as new movies continue to suck and people decide its cheaper to wait for the DVD so they can watch crappy movies in the comfort of their own home theaters (along with cheaper popcorn, more leg room, and no annoying jerks yapping on their cell phones).


4. Network TV will broadcast new scripted TV shows. Unfortunately, no one will notice because its been so long since first-run programs have been shown.


5. Some Miss USA candidate will say or do something stupid, then win the pageant.

Sports Headlines

1. Super Bowl Sunday will be declared a national holiday.


2. Some team will win the NBA Championship and another, the NHL Stanley Cup. And most of us won't notice or care.


3. Major League Baseball will see a drop in attendance as elite players show their true talent without the benefits of performance enhancing drugs. Shortly thereafter, Bud Selig will lift the ban on these substances. After all this is America's pastime. Give the fans what they want--legal or not.


4. China will dominate the Summer Olympics in Beijing even if they have to bribe every official and dope up every one of its athletes to do so.


5. I will continue to bore you with updates on the Tour De France (cycling) the America's Cup (yachting), and motor sports (NASCAR and Formula One). Did you expect anything less?

With that, I bid you a Happy New Year.