What Caught My Eye Today - 2007 Year in Review

I'm not exactly sure how to introduce this next list, courtesy of Blogcritics Magazine. Perhaps the title says it all.

The Top Ten Douche Bags of 2007

10. OPRAH WINFREY

This year, Oprah has the distinction of being the most annoying white woman on the planet. In February, Oprah’s latest publicity stunt included posing with kids at her new “school” in Africa for a television special. Oprah and her mindless, middle-aged housewife cult thought Oprah would surely become the new messiah she promotes herself as. Unfortunately, Oprah’s publicity stunt backfired on her as it was revealed that her school had become a haven for child abuse.

Here I was thinking that she made the list for selling out her principles and deciding to campaign for presidential contender, Barack Obama.

9. LARRY CRAIG

Beloved Senator Larry Craig from Idaho has always been a staunch opponent of gay rights. It’s sort of ironic that Mr. Craig was caught playing Dorothy Footsie in a bathroom stall on June 11, 2007. Since the arrest, several gay men have come forward to give detailed descriptions of their sexual escapades with Larry Craig.

I personally would have awarded a much higher place on this list for the distinguished horse's ass from Idaho.

8. BILL O’REILLY

Apparently, Mr. O’Reilly wasn’t content with referring to Mexicans as “wetbacks” a few years back. Everybody’s favorite right wing extremist told the world how surprised he was when going to a soul food restaurant in Harlem called Sylvia’s. “You know, I mean, everybody was — it was like going into an Italian restaurant in an all-white suburb in the sense of people were sitting there, and they were ordering and having fun. And there wasn't any kind of craziness at all.”

I would have thought that Bill O'Reilly would have had his name retired from this list. How about a little respect for this guy? Surely, he belongs on the Douche Bag Hall of Fame by now.

7. KATIE COURIC

Watching Katie Couric try and perk it up for her newscast is the equivalent of staring at the clock minute by minute and second by second. Watching her perk it up in Iraq made me actually long for the days of seeing Connie Chung on the news.

How much must Katie be kicking herself for giving up that gig on the Today Show? She went from being an cultural icon on morning television to national punchline on network news. I'm thinking that Matt Lauer and Meredith Vieira are going to keep their mouths shut and enjoy their good fortunes as long as they can.

6. DENNIS MILLER

Dennis Miller has turned from an intelligent, witty comedian to an angry, self-hating, right wing fanatic - but he is still relevant. Look up the word “failure” in the dictionary and you will certainly find Mr. Miller’s career next to it.

While I generally consider myself to be somewhat educated, I have to confess that many of Dennis Miller's analogies and references went way over my head. It's unfortunate to see such an intelligent and funny guy transform into a bitter troll.

5. AL SHARPTON

To the loving members of the liberal media, Al Sharpton is a hero who represents racial harmony, especially after representing Tawana Brawley. After all, he brought down Imus, correct? But where was Mr. Sharpton when Halle Barry, the half-white actress who pretends to be black, made anti-Semitic remarks on Jay Leno’s show?

Is there an implication of a double standard here? The heck you say. Not from a fine, upstanding individual like Al Sharpton. Why he is a pillar of moral integrity.

4. HILLARY CLINTON

Just six months ago, it seemed almost certain that Hillary would become our next president. At a time when illegal immigrants are marching through the streets waving their own flags, chanting anti-American slogans, committing violent crimes, and stealing identities, Mrs. Clinton gave her support for giving illegal immigrants drivers licenses, a privilege not even granted towards all legal citizens.

I'm not exactly sure that she was endorsing the practice of just giving out drivers licenses to illegal immigrants...I mean, they still have to pass that bonehead test like us legal citizens. Still, for being the experienced politician that Clinton says she is, she should have figured out that there was no way that this was going to end up well for her campaign.

3. BRITNEY SPEARS

After her divorce from K-Fed, her comeback was literally handed to her on a silver platter, but Britney had to screw it up with the non-stop partying, the stints in drug rehab, the military haircut, the hit and runs, and losing custody of her children. Her biggest crime is that her behavior overshadowed her album Blackout, one of the best musical releases of the year.

Britney really has become the living embodiment of the train wreck that everyone hopes will be avoided but cannot look from when the wreck actually occurs. The real tragedy is that the public seems to want more for Britney than she wants for herself.

2. MICHAEL NIFONG

District Attorney Michael Nifong successfully charged three white Duke Lacrosse players who raped an African American stripper. There was just one problem: there was no actual evidence of this supposed crime. Not only did the stripper keep changing her story, but Nifong admitted to not actually interviewing her until six months after charging the so called “criminals” with the false crime.

I know what happened. Nifong was out sick the day they taught law. I'm sure it was an honest mistake, one that anyone out for publicity and a potential run for political office might be guilty of committing. I'm sure those boys who were wrongfully accused have already moved on from this unfortunate incident.

1. GEORGE W. BUSH

No explanation needed.

And I think that says it all.