What Caught My Eye Today - Taxes, Potpourri

Taxes - The following are among the most peculiar taxes levied by states. I daresay "nonsensical" applies to a few of them.

• Sliced Bagel Tax, New York - Bagels are a New York institution, but not all are taxed equally. Order yours cut in half or request it toasted or topped with cream cheese, and you’ll pay about 8 cents extra. There is a "best thing since sliced bread" joke in there someplace.
• Blueberry Tax, Maine - Maine produces 99% of the United States' blueberries, some 80 to 85 million pounds per year. If you enjoy some this summer, count on being taxed.
  That 99% of blueberries come from Maine is a bit of surprise. A tax on the best berries for a pie, not so much.
• Playing Card Tax, Alabama - A deck of playing cards comes with a tax of 10 cents per pack. Sellers pay an additional $1 per pack.
  I'm guessing this is a vice tax of some sort.  Makes sense if you think about it. I cannot tell you how many times I've had less than the purest of thoughts while engaging in that diabolical card game known as solitaire.
• Vending Machine Fruit Tax, California - While fresh fruit is duty free, the pre-sliced variety of dubious origin sold in vending machines is not; you’ll pay a 33% tax.
  Seriously, who buys "fresh" fruit out of a vending machine?  
• Coffee Lid Tax, Colorado - Colorado deems coffee lids and napkins to be “nonessential” packaging, which makes them subject to the state’s 2.9% tax.
  I don't know about you, but as someone who occasionally hold a cup of coffee between his legs while driving to work in the morning, a properly secured coffee lid is absolutely essential.
• Hot-Air Balloon Tax, Kansas - In Kansas a hot-air balloon ride comes with a tax, unless the balloon isn’t tied down.
  Not much of a balloon ride, if its tied down. More of an open air elevator ride to nowhere if you ask me.
• Tattoo, Piercing, and Electrolysis Tax, Arkansas - All tattoos, body piercings, and even electrolysis hair-removal treatments are subject to Arkansas’s 6% sales tax.
  As if you aren't subjected to enough pain enduring one of these procedures, in some states you are taxed for it.
• Strip Club Admission Tax, Texas - There is a $5 "pole tax" assessed for visiting any one of Texas' 200 or so strip clubs.
  Undoubtedly the cheapest thing you'll pay for.
• Air Tax, Pennsylvania - Coin-operated vacuum vending machines are subject to a “use” tax.
  In defense of the tax, air don't suck itself, do it?
• Arrow Tax (all states) - Archery enthusiasts pay the Tax Man an additional 46 cents for arrows 18 inches or longer. Bows are taxed at 11%.
  I guess the NRA doesn't cover archery, otherwise this tax wouldn't stand a chance of surviving.

Potpourri - Yet more entries for the "so bizarre it must be true" file:

• Jobs - A recent survey has found that actuaries have the best jobs in America, based on the criteria of physical demand, work environment, income, stress and hiring outlook.  Biomedical and software engineers were next. Military personnel, lumberjacks and newspaper reporters had the distinction of holding the worst jobs.
  Has anyone ever met a real life actuary? Or, when was the last time your kid came home from school saying she wants to be an actuary, "just like Susie's dad"?  Hell, who actually knows what an actuary does (answer below)? I'm not judging, but, really, an actuary? 
• Iceland - There is a new smartphone application that helps Icelanders avoid accidental incest. The nation's 320,000 residents are often related because of generations of inbreeding. Prospective partners can "bump" their phones and hear an alarm if they are related.
  I first heard about this story on NPR and thought it was a gag, but nope, its the real deal, proving once again that there is an app for just about everything.
• Texas - A Texas teacher invoked her own racism to dispute allegations that she fondled a black student. The teacher, who is white, denied the first grader's accusation that she touched the student's private parts by claiming she doesn't even like "touching black students on the hand." The teacher was fired.
  Lemme see if I've got this right. A teacher tries to defend herself against child molestation allegations, but claiming she's a racist? Who allows people like this into the classroom in the first place?
• Wealth Gap - The average inflation adjusted income fro the top 10% of wage earners rose by $116,071 between 1966 and 2011. During the same 45 year span, the incomes of the bottom 90% grew by just $59.
  One can only assume that the skills associated with "would you like fries with that" haven't evolved much over the years.
• Defense Spending - Global defense spending fell by 0.5% in 2012 to $1.75 trillion, marking the first annual decline since 1998. The U.S. still spends the largest fraction of the total and 69% more than it did in 2001, but its share of worldwide military spending has fallen below 40% for the first time since 1991.
  Let's see here. U.S. defense spending is up, but its share of total spending has fallen. Europe (or at the very least, members of NATO) has slashed its defense spending as it tries to manage its way out of recession through austerity (how's that working out for you, Europe?).  You'd think that the U.S.'s percentage would have increased. So what's the deal? Can you say CHINA?
  
  Finally, as promised...An actuary is a business professional who deals with the financial impact of risk and uncertainty. Actuaries provide expert assessments of financial security systems, with a focus on their complexity, their mathematics, and their mechanisms. Wow, I almost dozed off just reading that.