What Caught My Eye Today - Saudi Arabia, Central African Republic, Basketball

Fred's Note: These first two items may be the most peculiar and disturbing stories that I've come across in a long, long time. Gentlemen, you may just want to skip the second story altogether.

Saudi Arabia - Saudi Arabia may have to stop beheading the condemned because of a lack of skilled swordsmen who can act as executioners. I'm sorry, what was that? Officials reportedly said that swordsmen are not readily available everywhere. Seriously, someone is punking me, right? On some occasions, executions were marred by confusion as the executioner was late prompting people to spread false rumors through social media that the accused had been pardoned. Let's assume for a moment that this story is true, this is really disturbing. Is there no honor among thieves?  As if it isn't bad enough that you have been sentenced to die for your crimes, you go and make it worse by lying in order to avoid having your head chopped off? Shameful. Just shameful.  A government committee studying execution alternatives has rejected a proposal to use lethal injections, but has ruled that execution by firing squad would not violate Islamic law. By no means I am an advocate of capital punishment in any form, but you have to admit that death by beheading or firing squad is probably rather painless and, unless I am very much mistaken, almost certain to get the job done in a fraction of a second. 

Last chance, boys. You sure you want to read this next item?

Central African Republic -  Ordinarily, I'm good for plenty of color commentary, but every once and a while a story like this one comes along where I find myself with nothing to add.  An anthropologist who recently visited a small town in the Central African Republic where she encountered two men who claimed that their penises had been stolen. It seems that the day before, a traveler visiting the town had shaken hands with a tea vendor who immediately claimed he felt a shock and sensed that his penis had shrunk. He cried out in alarm, gathering a crowd, and a second man then said it also happened to him. The condition is a real psychological disorder called koro in which victims (mostly men, but sometimes women) come to believe that their genitals are shrinking or retracting into the body. In order to prevent further shrinkage, victims have been known to securely tie their penises with string or metal clamps — even sometimes having family members hold it in relays until treatment can be sought, usually from shamen or traditional healers. Victims of koro usually believe that a touch or "accidental" brush with a stranger caused the theft, in the same way that a pickpocket might steal a wallet. No one has ever died from koro, at least not directly. Belief in koro can have deadly consequences: hundreds of people have been accused of stealing (or shrinking) other people's genitals, and dozens have been killed for the accusations. You can appreciate my quandary   Should I laugh (the mental image of a relay to hold a man's junk might be considered amusing in some circles)? Should I cringe (the idea of my package holing up in my nether regions for the rest of my life doesn't seem terribly pleasant)? Should I sympathize (psychological disorders, regardless of the affliction, are tough nuts to crack)?  I just don't know.

 Basketball - March Madness is here, my friends. For those of you not familiar with this annual downturn in office worker productivity, 68 men's college basketball teams and 64 women's teams will participate in their respective single elimination tournaments in hopes of winning the national championship for 2012-2013. As a way to engage casual fans who might not otherwise have any interest in college basketball, some genius came up with the idea to predict which teams would advance through their bracket to contest for the national championship. And thus, bracketology was born. Pretty stupid, right? I mean really, don't we have more useful pursuits to invest our time in? Clearly, I don't, but what about the rest of you? Before I reveal my picks to win (which is essentially the kiss of death for the teams that I've selected), take a look at just how big this stupid idea has become:

• $771 million - Amount paid for the TV broadcast rights to this year's men's tournament. 
• $0 - Amount that the athletes will take home as a result of competing. 
•  40 million - Number of brackets that will be filled out for this year's men's tournament. 
•  35.4 billion to 1 - Odds of filling out the perfect bracket.
  Coincidentally, there are about the same number of web sites offering advice on picking the perfect bracket. 

Now then, on to my picks. Ladies first. My Final Four includes (1) Baylor vs. (1) Stanford and (1) Connecticut vs. (3) Texas A&M. I've got Baylor beating Connecticut in the Final. On the men's side, my Final Four has (3) Michigan State vs. (2) Ohio State and (1) Kansas vs. (1) Indiana. I've got Indiana over Michigan State in the Final.