What Caught My Eye Today

China - An attempt to relieve a severe drought in China has apparently worked too well. This should be good. Meteorologists shot silver iodide into clouds near Beijing hoping to cause rain--but what they got instead was an 11-hour blizzard that buried the city in snow, stranding millions of commuters. Forgive me, I cannot resist...You know what they say--"when it rains, it pours." Still, the Weather Modification Office declared its action a success. There is an official government agency for this sort of thing? Scientists in other countries are skeptical saying that the effectiveness of cloud seeded is uncertain, because nobody can prove that it wouldn't have snowed or rained even without the silver iodide. Sounds like sour grapes to me. Why would the government invest in something that didn't work?

Ohio - Here's a novel approach to dealing with crime. Police in Columbus, Ohio have started telling crime-weary residents to move somewhere else. At least 20 residents told the City Council that when they called police about drug dealing and other crimes, the cops responded, "Why don't you move out if you don't like it." You have to admire their moxie, if nothing else. A spokesperson for the police department, said the police officers are suffering from overwork and frustration. I think the police are onto something here. If the residents don't like where they live anymore, they should look for someplace else to live. I hear there are lots of vacancies in Detroit.

Ethics - More than 30 members of Congress, including nearly half the members of the the House Appropriations Sub-Committee on Defense, are being scrutinized for possible ethics violations. I appreciate the fact that not all news is surprising, but this seems so obvious that it hardly seems to qualify as news. Several of the inquiries involve cases in which lawmakers provided legislation favorable to lobbyists who had given them campaign contributions. Again...duh. What motivation would lawmakers have to favors for lobbyists that didn't suck up to them? Should you be interested, at least 25 Democrats and 7 Republicans are under review.

India - Let's see what the 4-1-1 is on my favorite sub-continent. An Indian man is suing the makers of Axe body spray, claiming that in seven years of using the product he has yet to find a girlfriend. I do so love this country; so ripe with material. The 26-year old man says that Axe's racy marketing campaign lead him to believe the product had love-potion properties and is seeking $40,000 in damages. "The company cheated me," he said. "It says women will be attracted to you if you use Axe. I used it for seven years but no girl came to me." Already then. In no particular order, here are my gut reactions to this luckless soul. #1 - Dude, it's an advertisement. What did you expect them to say? #2 - Yeah, blame the body spray. That's problem. It's definitely not you. And finally, #3 - I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but from the sound of things, I'm not sure there is a potent enough love-potion in existence to help you out, bro'.

Poetry - Christopher Walken performs Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" as a spoken-word poem (click here). The funniest bit I have seen Walken do since the Cowbell skit on Saturday Night Live (click here). Judge for yourselves. Dude puts Lady Gaga's original to shame if you ask me.